チョッコとの戦争

I probably should do my homework now, but fresh from the fire of battle, I am moved to write. There is a dog in this house, a teeny, tiny dwarf of a dog, but do not let his looks deceive you. (He’s the one on the right)

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I rarely would use belligerently violent to describe an animal no less one of this small stature, but no other word comes to mind when describing this menace, known to the world simply as, Choko. Oh he may seem adorable in that his name means Chocolate, a harmless sweet one indulges in from time to time, and Okaasan might make him seem even cuter calling him Choko Pan (chocolate bread) from time to time, but believe me when I say this thing is a MENACE.

I noticed it pretty early on, that Choko walks around as if he owns the place, and by his mercy and generosity the Uda family is allowed to reside in the same house. For dinner, pedestrian dog food will not suffice, as he has become accustomed to a meal of rice, chicken, fish, beef twice a day made with great care by Okaasan. He circles the table hungrily at dinner, and while initially he will allow himself to be moved most likely out of laziness, he will attack without hesitation as I have learned.

In the first instance, I tried to move Choko off with my hand (bad idea man), and immediately he snapped his head around and chewed at the meat of my hand. My hand injured and Okaasan flipping the fuck out, I could not pursue the vermin at that time. But upon that day, I swore that this evil doer would see justice, that he would learn that he was not the Alpha male in this residence, that HUMANS were his masters.

So just now, I was moving him away from the table with my foot, when he without warning went into vicious growly mode and began attempting to gnaw my foot off. Moving to throw him off with my arm (I foolishly thought I would be fast enough this time), he immediately gave up the assault on my right foot to sink his teeth into my forearm, although I was able to get off a fairly smart kick. So now he sits beneath the piano stool, haughtily content in the fact that he has one, and here I sit typing through the stinging pain of my torn arm, but I swear to you Choko, I will have JUSTICE.

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